An Indecent Proposal

A lucrative proposal ? What could go wrong?

This one so far takes the cake. Tops the email I got here, maybe. https://meatsheetfanzine.com/it-gets-better-another-fan-mail-dickies/ . Sounds like a true entrepreneur. I’ll be the envy of the Brooklyn waterfront.

A lucrative proposal for you I have! I see that you are selling Meat Sheets and I am a very curious man that wonders if you would be interested in a collaboration? 

I live here in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I’m 22 years young. My name is Harvey Winston Minnow and I create and produce my very own custom Crocadillians. (some people call them Crocs). I find used tire meat on the roadsides and carve them into beautiful Crocadillians with lots of oxygen holes for your sweet, bare pansies to breathe! 

Also I have been producing and selling these beautiful Crocadillians for a solid two weeks and have not sold none yet, but I envision selling skillions within the next week or two.

I have three friends that have promised they would purchase a pair. However they keep avoiding me every time I approach them with the beautiful Crocadillans and looking for funds. 

So, where you come in with the collaboration is, I can see a limited edition pair of Meatus Sheet Crocidillians. Possibly with strips of rough cut venison hanging and dragging from a number of the Crocodillian holes. For your vegan readers we can use a plant based Venison strip that smells of kind hide, but comes from a sunflower or onion ring?

 
I’m not sure, but I think your readers would grasp at these quickly! You could sell them for $452.26, I’ll take the $452 and I will graciously let you take the .26. I think it’s a fabulous deal for both you and I and I truly believe that we will become bestiges and link up for many more collaborations in the future. I have so many lucrative concepts that are stone cold proven, there’s no way I can lose! Don’t you want a pair of Meaty Crocadillians wrapped around your bare naked paws as we discuss ???

Deep, dark, dirty, tire meat being used to emblazon the Meat Feet! Can you just take two seconds and make this dedication to me?
Your partner.

– Harvey Winston Minnow